October 27, 2007
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Un Consejo De Tu Tio Migs
Children are susceptible of influences; those whom they esteem most they will be the most likely to imitate. And as children generally suppose their parents to be superior to all others (which is why, my dad can beat up your dad never ends) they are very apt to be controlled by their influence, either for good or for bad. Hence the wise man says, "Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." The reality though, is that parents cannot train children in the proper path, unless they walk therein themselves. Reality check, Miguel!
Thoughts????
*Inebriated, drunk, intoxicated, tipsy, bent, blasted, blitzed, hammered, juiced, loaded, pickled, plastered, sauced, shit-faced, sloshed, smashed, tanked, toasted, wasted, A little too much of Grandpa's medicine....
Comments (33)
my dad can beat up your dad. http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,305536,00.html
actually, that story made me cry. a lot of things like this make me cry lately. i've become an emotional, sappy person in my older age.
used to be, nothing made me cry. guns, drugs, fights, death, poverty, hate... it was nothing.
but this makes me cry for a happy reason: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4
i hope it becomes easier with time, to walk that path ourselves...
cos it doesn't seem to be getting any better.
and the children are getting worse.
p.s. sorry for not coding the links. i was having trouble even getting the comment box to come up for some reason....
That kid there has the best of all possible worlds - plenty of money, guns, AND cute stuffed animals!
Though I actually know very little of how you live, Miguel, it seems to me that you're too hard on yourself in the present. Have you not been "walking therein" yourself since you took on the responsibility of children, Miguel? Do you not keep the guns and ammo out of their reach?
damn it dude... don't you know you're supposed to keep the guns and ammo away from your kids!
haha.. is the your pic btw?
solomon is indeed a wise man.
but also on the flip side... most kids nowadays (once they reach the age of 13 or so), don't esteem their parents that highly. their peers, i think, exert a far greater influence than family life, what they watch on tv (but that's related to who their friends are), the video games they play, etc etc.
but anyway. yes. walk the right path.
reminds me of that old commercial about the kid who starts using drugs - so the dad asks, "where did you learn this??"
and the kid goes, "i learned it from watching you ok?! i learned it from watching you!!"
cue silence...
Yep
I remember that commercial too.
I agree, I have always said children learn by example. I remember the cliche my mom used and it's proven true with all of my children, it's also how my eldest got his nickname. "Monkey see, monkey do." He grew up way too fast on me.
I guess the early years are really important then, when the child is most impressionable and looks up to you the most, before they can decide for themselves if what they see is right.
Of course you are right, but raising a child is a very complex thing, and it is easier to say than it is to do... I made many mistakes, I hope my child will view my mistakes as learning experiences. I tried to protect him from as much as possible, but I am human... a wise man I know once said, "they don't come with a guide.", a wise woman I know said, "treasure this time, don't rush, it will all be gone too soon." Those people were my folks, they made mistakes too..., I still love them both.
That picture is sad.
Thanks for dropping by Miguel. I am sure you are a wonderful father.
You forgot "lit".
just do the best you can and pray for the rest...............................
Hey, they know what they see now. What they see now is good. You're a good papa. Hope today doesn't hit you too hard, my friend. <3
ok, so all you can do is lead by example and hope your children find that they want to make you proud, whether it be by eminating you or following their own path. yes, children are susceptible to influence, biggest influence being the home.
secondly, I wanted to say thank you VERY much for your non-judgmental support. I feel like you are one of my good friends, because even the people in my life are doing the whole "i told you so" thing... but we are better now, things are back the way they should be... together =)
hope all is well!
"Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."
in some cases yes, in others, no. i have learned not to blame myself for the little stupid choices my kid makes, when she has decided to stray from the right path. she's making her way back ... at least she doesn't get high, hurt people, or steal. right?
crazy pic you got there miguel. i can totally picture that.
Yes few grow up to make good choice despite the screwed up people who raised them....but only a few.
I just spent three days watching a 6yr old boy who had been neglected and abused...so sad to know the path he will walk as a teen and then if he is lucky enough to make it as an adult.
This boy was born bright and happy and because of the things his parents made him endure his life will be a rough and rocky uphill climb always...sigh Makes me wonder in what ways have I messed up my kids??
Dont be too hard on yourself
Kids are easy to screw up, I got messed up without any help from maw or paw
Hey Miguel....I am NOT going to read ANY of your comments before writing my thoughts....I don't want them to sway me.....and I DO have kids.....I just don't write about them on my xanga but for protected....I should add you *makes mental note.....I will.....I don't keep many people there.....trying to think about people here that you would know....Alicia (dabomb), Mitz, sucko, Kathi, etc.....I keep them to just people that I consider good people and FRIENDS on here*.....BUT......I want to say.....the path that YOU are leading them in.....THAT path....works wonders for them..... yeah, they still can be influenced by their peers.....BUT...they will never lead a life like we did, because they have parents who are involved.....they just won't. My oldest.....is in 9th grade (shhh!
)...what a good, good girl....compared to me..... yes, they do screw up....but with a caring parent who has the time to care and be involved......holy shit....what a difference between her and me....
and I am sure in your house it must be the same......look how far you have come Miguel.
That pic.....at the top of your post..... THAT...isn't happening for YOUR kids, and you ARE guiding them correctly....kids...who have that!???? Yeah....they are screwed..... not ours, though Miguel....
That's done. And.....you watch......perseverence....and keeping doing as you are....and watch....all the work, all the stress....one day....look how awesome OUR kids will be....because WE stopped it. I promise.
I did not have perfect parents and I have not been a perfect parent. My parents made mistakes and so have I and unfortunately I will continue to do so. The best advice I have gathered over the years is for parents to lead the very best life they can because whether we like it or not, we are the main role model for our children. I am a better person because I am a parent, because I know they are watching and I have heard many others say the same thing. The other really really important ingredient (in my humble opinion) is to have a relationship with our children. We should talk to them, yes, but most importantly we need to LISTEN. With a little bit of silence they will tell us what is on their minds. Whatever that is needs to be handled very carefully because screaming and shouting and anger will clam them up and chase them away. The last thing most kids need is advice from their peers - from other kids who are struggling to figure it out just as much as they are. So, I think it is important for our children to know other adults that try to lead good lives. Adults that will be interested in our kids and encourage them and ultimately be another great role model. I could go on and on, but this is what I have found to be the most important when it comes to raising children. (I am leaving faith out on this comment because I don't know exactly where you stand, but that is one of the hugest elements for me.) I am almost certain that you are way too hard on yourself. =) The fact that you think about such things and are aware of the importance of how children are raised makes me know that you are probably a GREAT dad!
This photo made me feel sick.
There is nothing I can add here that hasn't already been said or that you don't already know.
I've said this before and I will say it again. Your kids are lucky to have you for a dad.
And! Wish I was there to be all those adjectives with you! I'll bring my bottle of Crown.
Thanks for the comment, sir...
Much appreciated
So true; we teach by our actions, not our words. I so admire you for "getting it together".
That is probably the saddest picture I've ever seem in my life. I see enough of that at school every day...these kids, I love them so much, but their lives are total train wrecks.
The Bible also says: You shall not boil a baby goat, in its mother's milk. So, watch out for that
Refer to previous message I sent you couple weeks ago.
What I'd like to know is what can I do to help the situation?
RYC: Thank you for your comment about my identity crisis. It was very helpful.
RYC: Chankla bread, you said it best.
And ironically, that is not the first time I've seen a baby surrounded by guns and money.
It probably won't be my last.
I wasn't influenced to imitate. Drugs, booze, and writing just seemed to good to pass up.
I prefer my child is armed so that she can can defend herself.
ryc: I am waiting with bated breath!
And counting down the minutes....
I am working on all your adjectives RIGHT NOW, Miguel....I sooooooo am! Maybe I won't even wait the 3 days.
p.s. I so did add you to protected this weekend.
Have a great night Miguel!
RYC: Man boobies AND a hairy ass? LOL Most of those things you listed would end up killing an average man, but I know you are not average.
The pork rinds - I eat a lot of those. Love 'em.
Miguel,you are a good father,end of story.
Your posts always touch me somehow....this one made me cry....love ya..karlie
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